Monday, February 12, 2007

Notes from a narcississia

Weekend update: In an attempt to stay entertained during the cold, I saw Dreamgirls with friends yesterday. Dang, Jennifer Hudson can sing! I tend to forget that performances like that are practiced - they don't come out perfect in their initial incarnation - so it kind of made me feel like crap. That happens (I've noticed) when I forget about things like learning and rehearsal. Or, in Anne Lamott's great writing terms, crappy first drafts. I read my favorite writers and listen to my favorite singers convinced that their words burst forth (with musical accompaniment, no less) the moment they deign to put pen to paper. Not fun, especially as I've been a little shy on earth-shaking creative force lately. As I ponder the vast hopelessness of wrestling a poignant, transformative collection of brilliant nonfiction from my brain out onto my computer, you can imagine how much fun I am to be around. (If you have a moment, kindly drop me a note in the comments and remind me that the quality of your life is not contingent upon me writing the perfect book...tell me how you're doing just fine and I should get over myself, shut up, and write something, whether it's world-changing or not :) )

In happier news, the Red Sox equipment truck left Fenway Park to head down to Florida for Spring Training today. Not the players. Not the coaches. Not even a lucky fan. The equipment truck is headed for Florida, and people all over greater Boston are pinning the story to our mental bulletin boards as proof that spring will - has to - come. To which I say...I wonder if I could write something poignant about that....

Just kidding :)


Sarakastic said...

Well, my mother never let me say "shut up". However, I can say, that I know you can do this, & I don't even know you, but I know you are a brilliant writer. I'm currently reading "The opposite of fate" by Amy Tan, who is the author of the joy luck club. It is her autobiography written in "musing" form, it's a lot like reading a blog of a famous person who doesn't know they are famous. Anyways, she talks a lot about what you were just expressing, which is something that I can't understand because I'm not a writer, so far it hasn't been too sad, just a very good book.

LEstes65 said...

While the quality of my life is not contingent upon you writing the perfect book, it sure is spiffied up by any of your writing missives. I don't care if it's a blog, an email, a novel, a short story about how awesome I am. Just as long as you're being you and getting it down on paper (or on cyber-paper).

And as a singer with no writing talent, I assure you that your wrestling with your muse is just like what I have to deal with, too. Imagine if every cold, sinus drip or sore throat took your ability to write? And it would be so nice if I could just pump out vocals without rehearsing (Ms. Underwood & Ms. Maines makes it look like anyone can just open up and belt it out without batting an eyelash - alas, it's all smoke & mirrors).

Those of us that share the love of their craft salute you and your perseverence. I love and appreciate every effort you make.


Swishy said...

Don't forget, too, that you are your own worst critic. As long as you keep writing, you're doing just fine. (And you BETTER keep writing, because lots of us want to be reading!)

kim said...

Even if you are not feeling it -- keep writing. Later, the words will either be better than you think they are or they will provide an inspirational starting point for brilliant editing -- by you of course -- you'll turn into your own muse.

Where's my muse? Am I making sense?

You are just having a moment -- it will pass. You're a fabulous writer.

Stacy said...

A lot of my writer's block is fear that I'm not good enough, that I won't write anything brilliant enough. Writing that first draft would so much easier if there was conviction that the final draft was going to be spectacular. So you're definitely not alone.

But don't lose your narcissism completely. That's what keeps us writing.

Pink Granite said...

Keep writing!

Invite your inner critic to hush and sit quietly in the corner while you write - anything and everything, in any and all forms!

As for the Red Sox equipment truck, I devoted my post yesterday to that very topic! What a bright spot in a cold winter week!

- Lee