Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Truth In Marketing

I was at the hairdresser's the other day when the rep for their new hair care line came in to check on inventory. I mentioned to Andrea, the genius who wrestles my hair into submission every six weeks, how I liked the smell of the shampoo. She told me something about the type of protein in this product, and how it's better for your hair because it comes from humans, rather than vegetables. Overhearing us, the Rep came over and joined our conversation, describing how vegetable protein can build up on hair and damage it. "It's much better to use protein that comes from humans, so you don't have a problem with overproteination."

"I've never thought to worry about overproteination," I admitted, struggling to keep a straight face. Then I asked what seemed like the next logical question: "How do you get the human protein?"

Silence. A panicked look crossed his face.

Me: "Are there rooms filled with women in third-world countries, all sitting over bowls and wringing the protein out of their hair to sell to Americans?" He didn't find that funny. Then the lady next to me said something about boiling hair to get the protein out, after which another hairdresser piped in with, "I thought they harvested it from dead bodies?"

The poor rep looked like he was going to pass out. I'm pretty sure he spent the weekend memorizing his fact sheets for "Answering Tough Product Questions." Really, though, he shouldn't worry too much. My favorite moisturizer "Contains the proteins found in young, healthy skin!"

Makes you wonder what they mean by "found"...

8 comments:

~Virginia~ said...

oh my. "human protein" brought to mind all sorts of things...

Stacy said...

Should I include my hair protein in my will? I can't have it go to just anyone!

Seriously, that's the grossest thing I've ever heard. What company is this so I don't find myself adding a quarter-sized serving of corpse to my hair every time I style it?

Paige Jennifer said...

This is what happens when a lawyer becomes a (great) writer - she spends a lot of her time arguing about language.

Oh how I heart thee.

Sarakastic said...

I think I'll stick to the risk of overproteinization.

Allie said...

That is hilarious. Thank you so much for asking that question!

LEstes65 said...

Like anything I use that might have come from something with a face? I pretend it didn't.

heidikins said...

Hahahahahaha!!!!

Oh my laws, I am dying laughing here.

.....

Yeah, I'm still laughing. I've got nothing more to say here.

xox

Kavita said...

"Times of India" printed an article about collagen harvested from corpses of prisoners in China, being used in face creams. Watch out!
Egg white may be a good alternative if at all; hair health really depends on your diet, doesn't it?
American lives are choc-a-bloc with artificial stuff I think. Is it true?