Monday, May 14, 2007

On the road to nowhere

It was quite a weekend, here in the Ryan Hood. We went to Maine to see my Mom (who is miraculously ALIVE this Mother's Day...Hooray!!!!) and had brunch with my parents at this gorgeous little restaurant overlooking a golf course. I was suffering from a bout of city-itis, so it was good for my weary soul to see green grass, flowers, and a guy in a pink plaid golf shirt sprawled out near the pond trying to retrieve a lost ball.

Then yesterday, Steve and I decided, "lets take a drive - see the ocean on the north shore, get some fried clams - it will be fun!" You know, the romance of setting out without a destination, sure the road will unveil wonderful adventure and exciting opportunities? Mmm hmm. Right. We hoped on Route 127, because it would take us all up the coast. What it didn't take us by was, 1. a bathroom; or 2. food. We drove for THREE HOURS - nothing. (Funny how much less appealing the vast, wave-filled Atlantic is when your bladder is about to burst from it's own vast wavy-ness.) Finally, we stopped in this creepy little town and burst into a very formal restaurant (it had a swan theme???) horrifying the staff in our flip flops and fleece jackets. I used the ladies room (swan-covered wall paper - towels - fixtures) and then we bolted out the door. I was hungry, but no way did I want a swan burger. Another HOUR later, we turned a little corner and saw what appeared to be a little slice of heaven, right there on the windy road: it was a rustic Clam Shack overlooking the marsh. "Look honey," I said, weary with hunger, "dreams do come true!" We placed our order, then settled in, certain happiness was close at hand. Mmm hmm.

Two HOURS later, we received our plates of clams (by this point I was hallucinating, wondering if I could make a meal out of tarter sauce, ketchup, and discarded straw wrappers)
Sometimes, as the wise Dorothy said after her long trek to Oz, There's no place like home...

In happier news though, THIS movie was on cable last night, reminding us that when all else fails, apply some Windex :)

8 comments:

JenKneeBee said...

ouch! what an adventure :)

Beth said...

I love that movie. I have seen it a million times. It just cracks me up!

Where the clams worth it?

ERiCA said...

Funny how much less appealing the vast, wave-filled Atlantic is when your bladder is about to burst from it's own vast wavy-ness.

Bwa! You poor thing

Princess Extraordinaire said...

Well you definitely can say you had your unplanned adventure!

LEstes65 said...

There's the show on one of those channels that has shows like this where some dude shows you how to survive situations that most couch bound idiots like me would NEVER be in. And I'm sure he'd be able to live off of tartar sauce, ketchup and discarded straw wrappers for at least 273 days. If not longer.

LEstes65 said...

By the way, I totally forgot to write my initial thought:

YEAH FOR MOM BEING MIRACULOUSLY ALIVE!!!! WOOOO-HOOOO!!! I really am so psyched to hear that.

Patti said...

I have so been on that road trip. Just reading this made me hungry and cranky and having to pee all over again.

And I am not why you were surprised that your mom was alive, but it is always a good thing. Go her.

Patti in UK said...

I loved this story. I'm from MA too, but live in the UK with my husband Paul who is a brit. I can't tell you how many times I have told him when we go back for a visit, we HAVE GOT to go to Maine! I love it there and I saved the place you went to with the golf course.. He loves golfing. Thank you for the funny story and wishing I had some fried clams right now.