The solution we've been waiting for

No time for friends anymore, but still want to feel popular? "The Popularity Dialer" just might be your answer!

From their website:

"Have you ever been in a situation where you wished your cell phone would ring? Maybe you wanted to look extra important or popular on that hot date. Or maybe you just needed an excuse to escape from an unpleasant meeting. With "The Popularity Dialer", you can plan ahead. Via a web interface, you can choose to have your phone called at a particular time (or several times). At the elected time, your phone will be dialed and you will hear a prerecorded message that's one half of a conversation. Thus, you will be prompted to have a fake conversation and will easily fool those around you. "

How delightful. So much more convenient than actual friends...

Sign up now and you can receive up to FIVE popularity calls, from either male or female voices! They will also affirm your existence, and/or pretend to be your cousin in need. But (the fine print reads) if you need more than five calls to jump you up the social ladder, you'll have to pay for them.

This might signal the demise of the whole Dale Carnegie system.

Don't worry, though - if you'd prefer not to receive popularity calls (I guess this comes into play if you often fall into a stupor and sign yourself up for internet services you don't really want?) you can send them your number now and they will put you on the official "Do Not Make Popular" List.

I found out about this site via the Boston Globe - in the Business section. Unbelievable. This must be what all the injured Red Sox are doing in their spare time.

I wonder if Meg Cabot knew about this important social service when she wrote this?